The Colorful Cinema and The Perished Dream

The Colorful Cinema

We walked passing the food court, the place was very inconvenient with bright orange and green everywhere. They told me why it is very inconvenient – they made it like that. I told you why it is very inconvenient: they made it like that. We walked passing the posters, we entered the cinema lobby.
You asked, ‘What date is it? Is it eight already?’
I looked at the date on the display on my cell phone and answered, ‘Yep, June 8 it is.’
And then you said, ‘Oh, there’s the film.’
And I said, ‘Where?’
You said, ‘Studio 2.’
And I just said, ‘Oh.’

The cinema was quite empty. There wasn't many people there.
‘Shall we buy the ticket?’
I looked at the schedule behind the cashier, ‘It’s still an hour again though.’
You insisted on buying it first, ‘Let’s just buy it and then take a walk outside.’
We bought the ticket, twenty-five thousands each. I gave her the money. She gave me the tickets. I gave you the tickets. But you give it back to me (‘I’m afraid I’ll forget where I put it’). So I put it in my bag, at the back of The Short History of Tractors in Ukrainian.
‘Just remember that it’s at the back of the novel.’
‘I’ve told you that I’m a forgetful person.’
‘We’ll see about that later.’ I smiled.
You smiled. I looked your smile. It was a stunningly gorgeous smile. And I could felt the time abruptly elapsing in slow motion, making me could see your every slight movements from your feet until the hair. The sound suddenly disappeared – I heard nothing except my own heart beating.

This was the time when the dramatic moment comes in film, like when Neo dodging the bullet. I could even amplify it with such black-and-white picture, but I choose it remained in colors. I remember, the lobby was shady red with blue and white signs. Your hooded t-shirt was green. I wore a yellow t-shirt with a beige cardigans on. My pupils were grey while yours were brown. Our jeans were a matching blue. I really enjoyed it until right after you really knocked the sub-consciousness out of me, by simply just saying,

‘Let’s go outside and find a place to sit.’
I sobered. ‘Okay,’ followed with a peculiar act in just a milliseconds time.

Luckily you didn’t notice.

* * *

The Perished Dream

So there we were, outside, trying to find a place to sit. I saw couples walking by holding each other hands. I saw it but think nothing. Did I try to think nothing or did I think nothing, I wasn’t quite sure.

Anyway then you said, ‘How about… there?’
And I said, ‘Where?’
You fingered, ‘There.’
And I just said, ‘Oh.’

We walked into the front of the Japanese restaurant. It has this big log at the façade for the waiting list. But we sat there and people passing by watched us like we were some sort of weird couple smoking there at the display. Maybe they considered us as a part of the unusual display, especially when you put my big headphones on. I wanted you to hear my other band songs. It was semi-acoustic one. I played the bass but sing few songs too.

And you realized, ‘Could this voice be… yours? It’s good…‘

I turned my head around trying to look the other way to keep you from seeing my blushing cheeks. But you realized. You teased me, I blushed. And after me begging you to stop teasing, we talked and talked again.

You talked about your perished dream, ‘Have you watched Great Expectations?’
‘Yes. You like it so much, do you?’
‘I still played the movie every week.’
‘Why are you quitting for just some silly reasons?’
‘I don’t know. I just quitted. I don’t even want to try it again.’

The voice was a soft trembling voice. I saw the look of sorrow in your eyes. You tried to deny yourself how you wanted to paint no more. But you could never lie; when we talked you always talked about the paintings, your paintings. You talked about the smiling faces seeing your paintings.

I gave an empty stare at the fountain in front of us, imagining the smiling faces of them when they look at the picture. I took a glance at your face; there goes the lovely face when you said much about paintings and drawings. So how could you say that you don’t even want to do that again?

You talked about the canvas and the crayon. I stared back at the fountain, listening the rest of the story. Then the gardeners came with a bucket full of flowers. They put the freshly-picked flower blooms into the fountain. I don’t know what the name of the flowers was, maybe you know it. You were the one who always wanted to have a flower shop. Maybe I’ll ask you later.

I wanted to go to the gardener that held the bucket and asking for a flower to give to you. But it was very harsh thing to do in the middle of you talking about your dreams. I considered doing it later and postponed the action. Which later I did and you kept the flower. Do you still keep it today? I don’t know but I hope so.

You talked about the picture of your ex,
‘It was when this meeting, we gathered around in a circle and on that time he was right there in front of me. I was so boring, I started to draw his face on my book unintentionally (I just considered him as a friend that time, though.). Later he asked me out, and so on, and then we were a couple. I gave the picture to him, he was quite happy and put it on the fridge.’

‘Haha, so just give your drawing of my face later, okay?’ I tried to tease you.
‘Well, okay, maybe you’ll become the first one I’ll draw after a long time.’

I turned around, trying to find a joking tone or even a mockery one but couldn’t find it in that sturdy looks in your eyes looking straight to the front. I didn’t know what you stared at, but one thing I did know was you weren’t joking, you weren’t teasing, you weren’t even trying to be cynical or something. Was it a sign, a green light, a candle in the dark that you’re trying to give me? Or it’s just a bundle of your last hope that you’re trying to fortitude?

I answered shortly, ‘…I’ll put it on my fridge.’
And suddenly I felt like I became the teased one.

* * *

We stood back, grabbed the bags, and started to walk inside.
‘Red or white?’ I asked you suddenly.
‘White,‘ you said to me.
So I came to the fountain and picked the one of the white blooms from the fountain.
‘For you,‘ I gave the flower to you.
‘Thank you,’ you opened your right palm, it was dirty, ‘Oh, my hands are so dirty, sorry.’
‘It’s okay. Maybe it’s because of the log. Look at my palm; it’s the same like yours.’

‘What is the flower’s name?’
‘I don’t know any flowers name – you’re the one who wanted to be a florist anyway.’
‘Haha, I don’t know either.’
‘White, huh? Could it be tulips?’
‘No, it’s not.’
‘…lilies?’
‘I don’t think so.’
‘I don’t know anymore name of white flowers.’
‘If it’s red then you’ll consider it as a rose?’
‘Maybe.’
'Ha ha..'

The automatic doors opened. We walked in and went up by the escalator until the top floor. We walked passing the food court, the place is very inconvenient with bright orange and green everywhere. You told me why it is very inconvenient – they made it like that. I laughed and said, ‘I feel a strong sense of dejavu… could it be we already have been here together on the past life?’

You chuckled. There goes the chuckle again, I said it in my mind. I chuckled.
We walked passing the posters, we entered the cinema lobby. We bought popcorn caramel and ice lemon tea. The cashier gave us the popcorn,
‘…is this it?’
‘Why?’
’They gave much much more at Blitz.’
‘Oh, the popcorn? Haha, you’re a silly popcorn boy..’
‘…but you ate it too before, right?’
‘But I’m not making such mess like the way you ate it.’
‘Okay, I’m not going to share it with you..’
‘Hey, this time I’m the one buying it.’
‘I don’t care.’

It was just a silly childish game we played. The cashier seems to look at us and worried whether we would make a ruckus right in front of the popcorn machine beside her table. Then we laughed.

We waited for a while – the doors hadn’t been opened yet. It wasn’t that much people waited in front of the studio. Even for the premiere of the film.
‘I wonder why there’s just a little people here…’
‘Maybe because of it’s Friday?’
‘Hey, it’s Friday night..’
‘We have six-day work. Luckily my college has five so I could spend the Saturday sleeping for the rest of the day.’
‘You lazy bum.’
‘Can’t help it, sleeping is one of human basic needs.
‘Haha, there’s a good point, clever one.’
‘Thank you, I’ll take that as a compliment.’

The conversation stopped because the door was finally opened. We waited for people getting in for a moment, and got ourselves in after no more people out there. I gave the tickets to the checker. She ripped the half of the tickets. She gave the rest of the tickets to me. I gave one of the tickets to you.
‘Choose one.’
You raised your eyebrows, ‘Why didn’t you keep it?’
‘Be romantic, okay? Keep it as a memorabilia of our date.’
‘Haha, okay.’

You picked the right one. I looked at the ticket, C-8, which meant that you got C-7. Hmm, I wanted to have the number seven, but it was okay anyway.

We looked at each other, smiled. I nodded my head a little to the left, ‘Shall we going in?’
You answered nothing, just smiled pleasingly and going in. It was like such a romantic act - we acted as if you were the Cinderella and I was the Prince Charming asking you to dance down the dancehall.

It wasn’t that much of audience inside the cinema. More than half of the red seats were empty. But I wasn’t surprised about it either. It was Friday afternoon and most of the people still busy in their cubicle working. The audiences there were mostly the teenagers, high school students; maybe they went home first and changing the uniforms right after the school hour was over then came here.

However, I didn’t care if it was empty or full.
As long as you were there with me, I didn’t care if it was empty or full.

* * *